Aha! Nothing Like Clear Direction

From our in-house newsletter:

"More students who finish their degrees, research that sparks economic development and programs that reach across the state and around the world are the targets of a strategic plan being introduced this week by University of Tennessee President [name removed by Piers for lack-of-tenure reasons].

(snip)

"A year in the making, the plan is organized into three mission-oriented focus areas: student access and success; research and economic development; and outreach and globalization. Benchmarks have been set for several defining elements of each focus area, and yearly goals, both external and internal, are being set through 2012. Internal benchmarks and goals are intended to enable the mission targeted by external goals."

Wow. You could come up with wording like this in fifteen minutes at a sports bar. Is there a class of university bureaucrat whose job it is to generate boilerplate like this? I know, I know, I'm being unfair. This is just a newsletter blurb; more details are forthcoming, and all that.

But hey, while I'm on a roll, more unfairness: note the lack of faculty development. And I wonder, is the boneheaded "merit pay" scheme part of this strategic plan?

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Life with a Toddler, Vol. 8

Heard recently around our house:

• "We don't climb on top of the table."
• "Please take your finger out of your diaper."
• "Don't put your finger in kitty's nose."
• "No, we don't eat kitty's food."
• "I'm not sure kitty likes it when you pick him up by the tail."
  

The Little Boy's Ultra-Luxo swimming pool

Ready, set. . .



wheee

Simon

He's not quite dignified yet--



But he is a sweet boy.

Pig Pickin Phase 1 Complete

We picked up a load of concrete blocks today, since Papa is in town with his pickup truck ("pick up" with a "pickup," get it?). This means that the first phase of our NC Barbecue invasion has been set in motion! Phases left: rebar, chicken wire, charcoal, pig. We'll keep you updated as events warrant

Test to see if you think like a West Tennessean

If you needed to transport a four-drawer filing cabinet and a car engine down the street and around the corner, what means might you use?

a) Ford F-150
b) wheelbarrow
c) transporter (a-la Star Trek)
d) Ford Tempo
e) John Deere backhoe

We saw proof tonight: the answer to the above question is "e."

This Month's Reading

More ambitious material (at least for me it is. . . some of my readers might be able to toss one of these off in a weekend, but not me):

First, The Tale of Genji, another fix for my obsession with Japanese culture, art, etc. I'm not all that far along, and I'm having some trouble with names, etc., but I can say that I am amazed by the aestheticism of Heian culture--apparently all things are done in this world for artistic effect, and responses are usually hyperbolic (weeping, fainting, etc).




Next, Mario Vargas Llosa's The War of the End of the World, a novel that shows up more clearly than any other his interest in apocalyptic/utopian strains of thought (an idea quite clear in his latest, The Way to Paradise). I wish my paperback copy had as cool a cover as this one; mine looks like some 1970's adventure film. Reading about Brazil right after being immersed in Borges' Argentina is a little disorienting, but I enjoy the epic scope of this novel.


Also, and the Buzzard will be glad to know I've finally gotten to it, I'm watching the second half of Kurosawa's Seven Samurai tonight after choir practice. So far, I'm pretty sure I'd go into battle following Kambei Shimada (played by Takashi Shimura). I know that Toshiro Mifune is usually seen as the big dog in Kurosawa's films, but I'm not thrilled with his character. . . yet. I preferred him in Red Beard and in Yojimbo. But like I said, I still have half the film to go.

'That 70's Show' + Memphis News =

The print edition of today's Memphis Commercial Appeal has a headline straight from That 70's Show (a sitcom I love, BTW):

"Heavy on the Oregano, please"

Must not have been a popular joke--the online version of the story goes with the much more straightforward headline. Too bad.

Come on out; the weather is fine

We got an all-too-rare treat this past weekend; our beautiful and brilliant friends from Chicago, RS and SWS, came down for their first visit to our corner of West Tennessee.

We had a lovely time--lots of conversation, lots of grilled food and quaffables. We here at Luigi's Mansion really enjoyed being able to share some of our space and some rural quiet. And the weather on Saturday could not have been better--cool, breezy, and no humidity. It was also fun to take them around, show them the campus, the other neighborhoods in town, the Rural King. Didn't make it to the DQ, though. Got to save something for next time, I guess!

One of several great moments: watching The Little Boy and S spin around in the back yard, then seeing them both collapse in laughter in the grass (well, technically Lespedeza, but in our backyard, if it's green, it counts as grass!).

Thanks for coming, R & S. Sidney says he'll give up his room anytime you want to come again. Simon says only if there's no cuddling involved.

From the Inbox

Now this is what I call a broad scope. On the other hand, it has the advantage of being in Wales:

CONFERENCE TITLE: "fragment, cultural histories and vocabularies of the
fragment in text and image c. 1300-2000"

3 day Interdisciplinary Conference, hosted by Department of English, and
Institute for Medieval & Early Modern Studies, University of Wales,
Aberystwyth, UK

500 word abstracts for discussion papers, creative workshops,
performances/installations by 16th December 2006

Themes might include: making/unmaking, text/intertext, pastiche bricolage,
narratology and poetics, embodiment, artefacts, figments,
interdisciplinarity, memory and remembrance, archaeologies of meaning,
remnants/remainders

Selected papers to be published by Manchester University Press

university of wales, aberystwyth

What, no Ancient Greeks?

An essay for my fellow eggheads

On the difference between what attracted us to capital "E" English and what the reality is on the other side of postgraduate education. link.

Key phrase: "English is, among my undergraduates at least, one of the last refuges of the classical notion of a liberal-arts education."

That's what it is for me, too, which may be why I find it so fulfilling. Granted, I'm also at an institution where there aren't quite so many other pressures. In fact, the state of the profession that "Prof. Benton" decries is actually far from my experience, and I often wonder at the repeated complaints along this line--i.e., to get a Ph.D. in English, you have to destroy your love for the literature. Has my experience been so different from other people's? Have I been that naive? Is it that I studied where I did, under whom I did? Is it just that I'm out of the "big time" and satisfied to be on the sidelines?

anyone else have thoughts?

On Campus, Summer 2006

Here's the quad, from the front of our building on campus.




Now, here's the view from my office window.

Weekend Yard Report

With the mower fixed, and a weekend free from other responsibilities, we hit it. Mowing: check. Weed whacking: check, and still in progress. Edging: ditto. Weed & Feed for back yard: check. Watering: check. Transplanting seven bushes, including a Crepe Myrle: check. Pruning rosebush: check. Removing diseased and unsalvageable shrub: check. Obsessing over and manually pulling massive patches of Virginia Buttonweed in front and back yards: check (did this last item actually make a difference? Of course not!)

Sweat, dirt, and ticks: check, check, check!

Life with a Toddler, Vol 7 (UPDATED)

This weekend, The Little Boy decided that he would experiment with the potty. We've had one sitting in the bathroom for a couple of months now, and he has been willing to sit on it--while the lid is closed and while he's got pants on. But for some reason, on Saturday he decided that it was time to sit on it to use it. We had several false alarms, including once where he leaked all over the bathroom and then in his bedroom.

But this morning--huzzah! three cheers! He sat and produced! (number one only; number two is a whole 'nother ballgame, I'm sure) Looks like our approach of letting him take his time is bearing fruit. He doesn't like to be pushed into doing things.

Wonder where he gets that from?

UPDATE: Four times today.

Well, that settles it, don't it?

I'd write about my agreements and disagreements with this article, because I found it both interesting and perplexing, but evidently to do so would be to fall into the trap of questioning Professor Balmer's "evangelical credentials." In fact, note from the very first that he inoculates himself against disagreement by using the Galactic Emperor defense: I have forseen it!!

Wehell then.

I was glad to note, though, that he has full assurance that there's still time for James Dobson--even The James Dobson!--to be redeemed. How charitable of him.

For the record, I'm sure Jesus is not a Republican. Or a Democrat or a member of the Green Party or the Netroots or the Libertarian Party or the John Birch Society. Or even--*gasp*--a citizen of the 21st century! In fact, I'm fairly certain he wouldn't have voted for any of our current officials, since his last recorded physical act on this planet was during the Pax Romana.

In which Piers gets More Information than he wants

Sitting in my office on a late afternoon this week, door open. Student walks into the office suite, moans that a colleague's door is closed. "Hey," he says, "do you know when Dr. _____ will be in?"

He said he would be back on Friday.

"Really? Because I need to talk to him about a grade."

. . .

"I got two A's and three B's in his class, and he gave me a B, so I need to see if I can work something out."

. . .

"I'd like to have an A in the class, y'know."

. . .

"So I just want to talk to him. If I can't, that's okay, but I'd just like to talk to him."

. . .

"Did you say he would be back on Friday?"

He said he would be back on Friday.

"I'll just come back then."

Sounds like a good idea.

Our new foe

Dioda virginiana L., or Virginia buttonweed. Hate it, hate it, hate it. There are spots in the backyard where it has killed all the grass.

The 2C rule strikes again!

My brother says that with the purchase of a house, one becomes subject to what I'm calling the 2C rule: All repairs, etc. start at $200 and work upwards in increments of 2C (i.e., 200, 400, 600, 800). Well, our mower is being returned to us this evening to the tune of . . . you guessed it . . . 2C.

Hey, cheaper than buying a new one (which would be in the 5 x 2C or 10C range)--and with all the rain we've been getting this week, it's not a moment too soon.

On the upside, the rosebush we planted earlier this year is putting out several nice yellow blooms, and we'll have some tomatoes before long.

New Pictures Up

follow the link to the latest slideshow, if you're interested:

.mac pictures

Looking to kill some time?

Those of you with video game systems or computers--ps2, xbox, gamecube, pc, mac, game boy, nintendo ds--you need to do yourself a favor and get ahold of Lego Star Wars. It is a major hit at Luigi's Mansion, our abode. W, who's not much of a video game fan (besides this game and Wario Ware), absolutely loves it: it's perfect for two players, controls are simple, the worst that happens is that your little lego person falls apart (i.e., it's basically nonviolent), and replayability is out of sight. Plus, it's legos! Who doesn't like legos?

And here's the best part: the sequel is coming out in September! You've got time to finish the first one before the second one is on the shelf at Target! Buzzard, I'm talking to you!

Two Updates

1. PowerBook now safe from malicious theft; History department chair now safe from wheedling English professor begging use of master key. They got me an office key that works. Now I can put up my priceless works of art!
2. Piers set straight on a bit of sloppy writing. In the post below, ES responds with a lengthy and pointed critique. I recognize that I got rhetorically sloppy in my initial post. I don't attribute the dishonest thinking to "most of my colleagues," as I said originally. I should have said that folks who get caught up in messes like this often use such-and-such a fraudulent defense. I don't know that many people, for one thing, and for the other, I haven't gone to school or work with more than one or two who evidence that kind of mendacity. My main point is that we professors need to be careful about the power we intentionally and unintentionally wield. Suitably chastened, I am at least glad to note that somebody is reading this stuff.
   

what profs believe

I don't know if you all are familiar with the whole Kevin Barrett business at U of Wisconsin-Madison. Essentially, this Mr. Barrett has been hired by the university as an adjuct instructor to teach a course on Islam. Part of the course will be a "week" on the "so-called 'war on terror'" (his words). He is a leading proponent of the notion that the attacks of 9/11/01 were part of an extensive government conspiracy, that the WTC towers were set off on purpose, etc.Well, it's caused an uproar in many circles. Prof. Althouse, a law professor at UW, has all the relevant background if you can stomach it.

I've got nothing to add to the discussion of whether or not 9/11 was a government 'program,' but this does remind me of a notion that's been rattling around in my brain for a bit: professors/instructors/teachers need to take seriously their position of power in the classroom. I note that many of these kinds of conflicts (see also the Crystall incident at UNC a couple of years ago) are often argued on the merits of the various arguments at play. What many of my colleagues in this profession seem to want to ignore is that their positions as graders, as evaluators of student performance, provides them with a powerful platform. It is not enough to simply aver that one "teaches all sides of the issue," or that "students needn't regurgitate what I tell them," or that "I'm just trying to start a conversation." First of all, most professors are pretty rotten at starting conversations. Second, anyone who says these things and believes them has forgotten what it's like to be 19 or 20 years old, away from home, and taking 4 or 5 classes at one time. Political content is one thing--it's to be expected. But to attempt to "defuse" purposefully incendiary course material by suggesting that students can just ignore it is plainly dishonest.

And it doesn't help matters that I've had more than one conversation where a colleague (at UNC) has told me in all seriousness that she doesn't believe the classroom is a "free speech zone." Yow.

Which makes my warning to my students particularly apt: "don't trust what your professors tell you!" They know I'm joking, but only partly.

The fly in the ointment

You know what will take the shine off of having a new office of your very own?  

When your assigned key won't open the door.

Novum Sanctum

Well, it's finally happened . . . I moved all my belongings into my new (my own!) office today. It's small, and quite institutional, but huzzah! It's my own space! First major task: find a spot for pictures of the Little Boy, then find a spot for the "joy" scroll from Blackbuzzard and Hambone.

Moving-in (mostly) done

We are happy to welcome B&R to West Tennessee. . . they finally moved into their new house this past week. We had grandparents in from out-of-town, and needless to say the Little Boy was happy to occupy as much of their time as possible. Many hands made relatively light work. I even got to help paint a room!

It's a 30-mile drive from our house to theirs; exciting to have them so close. It'll be good for the Little Boy to have Uncle B and Aunt R nearby. And I get to play Half-Life 2 on B's XBox! Yow!